Thursday, August 04, 2005


The CKE has decided, now that the camera phone is finally working again to post a picture dump...Stories will be added to pics as they come in but this is the easiest way to keep the krew A-BREAST of the happenings at Karaoke.

what more could you ask for?

more sad than anything

Easy like Sunday Morning

Feel free to add captions or send in your stories. More to come on the Picture dump.

The Closer
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Sunday, July 31, 2005

What's going on?!


Alright Krew -- We are lagging behind, and this time it's serious.

We've gotten a TON of complaints about the lack of postings lately. Now we are very sorry, but this thing cannot simply make itself. Alas, the CKE admits that we are mere mortals and haven't been doing as well as when we were doing better, but we haven't exactly had a lot to work with lately.

But don't worry -- no one's mad.

All this to say, WE NEED YOUR STORIES!!

We could publish all of ours, but we want this to be an Everyman ("Everywoman" -- sorry, Megan) site.

So please click the little link on the right side of your screen that says "Submit Stories" (see, I even put arrows around it!) and send in your tales or ideas so we can all get this site crack-a-lackin' once again.

See you all tonight
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Saturday, July 23, 2005

Real Men Of Genius...This doesn't include Niblett...Or does it?

Thanks Niblett
Now I understand that Niblett and the King are no longer fueding -- no, really -- but I just wanted to let everyone know that Bud Light weighed in on the side of The King and I thought everyone should know.

Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius (Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute you Mr. Jean Shorts Inventor (Mr. Jean Shorts Inventor)
People insisted that jeans were just pants, apparently those people underestimated your out-of-the-box thinking (A fashion trail blazer)
Casual enough for a BBQ, formal enough for a family reunion, your multi-dimensional creation handles both duties with ease (You just said DOODY)
And what should we call your ground breaking achievement? How about Jorts? (We really love your jorts)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. Jorts Inventor
If fashion's a war, you're fighting dirty. (Mr. Jorts Inventor)

The audio for the Ad is HERE, along with all of the other Real Men of Genius ads.

Thanks for the heads up Hot, White, Dred-less Future.
And thanks, of course, to you, Mr. Real Men of Genius Jingle Writer.
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Thursday, July 21, 2005

Emixalot v. Niblett: the Great Karaoke Klash

War of the Worlds?
"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind." ~John F. Kennedy, 1961

Pictured here is General Emixalot of the Karaoke Krew and Field Marshall Niblett of the KNDE-95 Army. These two men have fought a brutal campaign for supremecy for more than two weeks. But last night, all the tension rose to the boiling point, only to end with -- what else? -- a BJ and shots.

The tale of this Cool War begins weeks ago when FM Niblett called out the King over an amazing rendition of "Slow Jamz" with White ChizzyChocolate. (If you don't know the story, go here to catch up with the rest of the world)

After FM Niblett's extreme attempt to humiliate the King publicly and an open declaration of war, the King responded in grand fashion -- with a custom t-shirt. "How else do you show someone you mean business?" the King said. The Timberlake Wannabe shirt was received with enthusiasm by his subjects and resulted in screams of "Niblett Who?!"

The opposing armies entered into brief skirmishes in the following weeks, the most notable led the Hot, white, dred-less, Future to ask, "Why do you [Niblett] want to be like Emixalot so bad?"

But last night changed the world.

According to reports, Emixalot took the stage to perform "Ice Ice Baby" -- in a way no other mere mortal can do -- when an annoying, familiar voice calls from behind him, "Tuck in the front and grab your belt!" Taking the insult as a challenge, the King does so and responds, "Hey Niblett! Blow me!" This fiery rhetoric spurred the Field Marshall to jump onto stage and act like he was -- in fact -- performing fellatio on the King (this may have been a dream come true for Niblett, but we'll leave that for historians to debate).

After the song, Niblett and The King went to Babershots for pre-war talks, hoping to avert the impending war that would soon embroil the two warring camps. FM Niblett offered up a Pink Panther to assuage any disrespect he may have caused through the psy-ops waged on his radio program. Through this simple display of respect and a toast to the Front Tuck, the War of the Worlds was averted before a drop of beer was spilled.

Now in the post-war era, experts expect the occasional jab or snide comment made at the other's expence (I mean, the pair's first exchange after treaty talks closed were, "Niblett, the only guy who still wears denim shorts, make your way to the stage;" to which Niblett replied, "My mom thinks I am cool;" to which the King responded," Your mom thinks I am cool too!")

Closing Thought from the King: Don't try to out-do me, Niblett. We may have a truce, but on my turf, the King will always win.

P.S.: Adam Knight, the 3pm-6pm DJ -- who one would have expected to come down (hehe) on the KNDE 95 side of the Battle of the Front Tuck -- made sure the King knew he never said a word about me on air. (Sounds like someone wants to give a BJ...)
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Wednesday, July 20, 2005

C-Money's Money-Shot-O-the-Week

You fill this in!
This is the second C-Money Money-Shot-o-the-Week. It's YOUR chance to tell US what's going this picture at least.

So here's what you do:
1. Look at the picture
2. Click on "comments"
3. Write your caption for the posted pic. It can be anything. Make it funny/witty/insightful/dirty
4. Click "publish"

It's that easy to get in on the fun. So go ahead. Try it. You know you want to... If you're not satisfied, you can have your money back...
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Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Where are all my Peeps?

Where is everyone...I am lonely!
What's going on!?! I know I know...Where is the Krew? The Elders have received several emails and phone calls concerning the Krew and their whereabouts.

Well, rest assured we will be back in action tonight. And the last post about us having real lives outside of Karaoke -- that was a BIG LIE!! I don't know what D-Gert was thinking.

But in response to your emails...

Emixalot was galavanting about in Galveston with a 3-year-old girl and a 32-year-old man. This story would be better had the three of them been related. However, he took a note from the "I want to be DJ Fully" handbook and met them online for an all out ROMP in the ocean. TRUTH: We actually were related -- the girl is my cousin and the man, my uncle -- whom I haven't seen for a really long time, but the joke isn't funny unless we are unrelated.

D-Gert was -- as you can guess -- busy with his presidential campaign. Let me remind you all of his platform: "A Raucous White Rapper over every lonely heart, and a 'flatie' in every home." Obviously, Emixalot will be his running mate and we hope you VOTE OR DIE in the upcoming election. TRUTH: Actually he was packing for his upcoming move. Once again, this story isn't all that funny.

The Infamous Shelly B and White Chocolate...well, those two are still MIA, although I would like to remind you that "The Sexual White Chocolates" are still out there terrorizing whom (who? whom? I don't know...) ever they meet. TRUTH: Once again, I am sure they will be there tonight. I think they were just out getting drunk and participating in orgies, which is actually about as funny as the fake story.

Megan, soon to be known as "Shades," was on a four day tour of her lecture series -- entitled Screw Men: I Can Do It Better Myself -- that offers answers to those impossible questions about men, e.g. "How are there impossible questions about men? We are easier to figure out than dogs." TRUTH: She actually was probably doing this, but I think she was feeding my cat.

Dj Fully, well the whole Hopelessly-White-And-There-Is-No-Help, But-I-Want-To-Rap-So-I-Will-Try-Anything-To-Be-Black camp really went into some extra innings. He should be making an appearance tonight. But yeah, he is starting to become a disgrace to several races with every song he sings. TRUTH: Need I remind you all of "Space Jam." BTW, I have nothing to add, this is really where he was.

C-Money is trying to pick up three chicks at one time again. Unfortunately, all of the ladies that attend Karaoke are onto his game (thanks to our interviews) so he went slinging his game at a few other establishments hoping to spread is Country Money love. TRUTH: That is so unhealthy... I actually think he was sitting at home, in his mother's basement, but whatever...

Anyways, we will be back tonight at POETS. See you there.
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Saturday, July 16, 2005

Sitting Out

Both of us are busy in the real world (yes, we do have lives apart from karaoke) so posting will be light to non-existent through the weekend, and maybe into Monday and Tuesday too.

However, don't worry. We shall return!

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